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Caregiving Hospice End of Life

Caregiving and In-Home Care

Presentation on Caregiving, Palliative & Hospice Care 20 March 2024

Recording

Shirl Rollins, wife of Rich (USNA 66, 2nd Company), shares her personal experience as a caregiver to her spouse who has Parkinson’s disease. Shirl describes their journey, from the initial diagnosis to seeking support through the VA caregiver support program. Classmate Don Jackson (19th Company) describes his experience in caring for his wife, Maureen, through two bouts of cancer to palliative and then hospice care. Finally, Colleen Shields from Hospice of the Chesapeake presents the differences and benefits of hospice and palliative care. See additional resources below.

Caregiving Resources

Hospice Resources

End of Life

Preparing to Cross the Bar

Though it’s not a pleasant subject to consider, planning for our final days is a task too often left unattended. This can cause additional consternation and stress for your family in a time of great sorrow. Being prepared can alleviate that stress, and it’s not difficult to do. The phases of preparedness are planning; recognizing the signs of failing health, getting health care, and obtaining hospice care; reporting a spouse’s death; setting up services and burial; and how to carry on after the loss of a spouse.

Below are links to resources that may be helpful to support our Classmates and their families at the end of life.

Presentation on Funeral Options 23 July 2024

Recording

Greg Rollins, a veteran in the funeral business, shares his extensive experience, including starting Rollins Funeral Home Service and serving over 12,000 families annually. He discusses the selection of funeral directors based on previous experience, word of mouth, and internet reviews. The conversation covers topics like cremation, burial, pre-arrangements, and services for veterans. Greg emphasizes the importance of understanding funeral home facilities and costs. Q&A and other information from Classmates follow:

Q&A:

What are the key factors to consider when selecting a funeral director?
Previous experience with the funeral home, word of mouth recommendations, and the role of the internet in selection.

What is the importance of family involvement in decision-making for burial versus cremation?
It is critically important to involve the family in decision-making for burial versus cremation. Greg highlights the significance of considering the wishes and perspectives of family members. He stresses that it is crucial for individuals to involve their family in these decisions because the family members are the ones who will be living beyond the individual’s death. He mentions examples where family members had different preferences than the individual, emphasizing the need to listen to and consider the desires of all family members in the decision-making process.

What issues should be considered regarding cremation?
Presence of metal implants in the body, such as radioactive pellets, can impact the cremation process. It is important to inform the cremation facility about any metal implants to ensure a safe and successful cremation. Additionally, decisions about what to do with the cremated remains after the cremation process should be made in advance, considering family preferences and any specific wishes of the deceased individual.

What specific information about funerals is important for military veterans?
Military veterans are entitled to benefits such as a grave space for themselves and their spouse, a flag, and burial in any national cemetery. They can also be cremated and placed in places like Arlington National Cemetery. The funeral director can help coordinate services at the cemetery, including military chaplain honor guards and Patriot Guard services.

Follow-up Question: What is the purpose of a vault? Should you consider the most expensive option or a less expensive alternative?
There are two categories of Outside Containers

  1. Liner – this is a non-sealing concrete box, the purpose is to prevent the grave from sinking in
  2. Vaults – There are many levels of “sealed” Vaults, the purpose of this type of vault, again to prevent the grave from sinking in, second would be to keep out the elements, and protect the casket.

Greg suggested the minimum level sealed vault.  However it is a personal choice, some feel they need more protection with copper or bronze lined vaults.  These are much more expensive. Most cemeteries do require a minimum liner.

Classmates also contributed this information:

  • The VA National Cemetery Administration, National Cemetery Scheduling Office, will issue a “determination of eligibility for burial” upon request. This letter provides advance evidence of eligibility for the veteran and spouse.
  • In California if you scatter cremated remains at home you must declare it when the house is sold. No idea what other states do.